Behind the Closet Door

I have a new book coming out tomorrow! A great way to start the new year. Here's a brief bio about me for anyone interested: I live in Virginia with my husband Roger and my dog Bodie. I enjoy making jewelry, painting and floral arranging. I have traveled in South Africa for over twenty years. I have been writing seriously for several years now. I have a published historical fiction novel called Through the Cane Fields. I am currently writing a sequel to Behind the Closet Door. So, here is a short blurb about the book: Henry Peterson is having a bad week. Trouble at work and the ceaseless rain are starting to get to him. When Henry is jilted by his girlfriend, Michelle, on the night of their anniversary, he overreacts in a way he never dreamed. Her sister Marilyn has always suspected that Henry is not the perfect boyfriend. His excuses are plausible but his manner becomes more erratic. He finds himself doing things he never imagined to keep the girl of his dreams from slipping away from him. Henry’s problems are just beginning when Officer Rex Roland appears at his door. Rex isn’t your ordinary cop. Henry’s descent into darkness helps him recognize a kindred soul. Desperate to keep his twisted reality a secret, he will stop at nothing to keep Michelle right where he wants her. But even Henry can’t predict how deep the descent will be.

I see that I have not posted a blog since 2010. Shameful. A lot has happened since 2010. for Starters, I had my first novel published this spring. That was an amazing experience.

It has been classified as Historical fiction but I think it works as literary fiction as well. Here is a short blurb about the book. Through The Cane Fields is the story of two young sisters living a life of privilege in Apartheid era South Africa. Delia Hallowell is content with her care free, luxurious life until she meets a boy named Thomas. As the son of the cook, Thomas is separated by the divide of class and race. As their friendship grows over time, so does the realization that they cannot be together. We see how both sisters try to navigate their world. Susan is self absorbed and grasping and Delia is kindhearted and intelligent with a thirst for knowledge and a keen desire to be educated and to make something of her life. They both face trials and tribulations as their world changes around them. Delia must make a choice between her true feelings and her family’s expectations. I hope you'll check it out.

Breakfast Sisters

My little sister is five. I was lucky that my Dad found someone great and got remarried and now I have a sister, something I have always wanted. I’ve known her since she was a day old and ever since, she has been my shadow.

When she was a year, I started to babysit her. I got blocks and Leggos and stuffed animals for her and she loved them all. Not having any children of my own, I have enjoyed watching her grow.

Her little personality started to develop early but really started to shine around the age of two. She was already starting to exhibit that strong independent streak that runs through our family but now that she is older, I can see how much tougher she is, than I was at her age. She knows what she wants and knows how to make things happen. She doesn’t throw tantrums or fits but looks at me with her very serious little face and basically gives me a speech on why things should be her way. I imagine she will probably be a lawyer one day, complete with briefcase and sensible shoes.

She is also extremely self conscious about how other people see her. She is a beautiful thing. Lovely doe brown eyes and sandy hair but she doesn’t like to stand out. When I took her to the local pool, she wanted to know why all the other children had water wings instead of the antiquated floatie that she had to wear. I told her that she would have to ask her Mom and she shrugged her shoulders and accepted it.

The next time, she was determined to swim without it. I must say, I did notice a lot of little kids diving in the water and swimming like fish. Her mom and Rog were with us, and there were several life guards at the pool so we watched her practice trying to stay afloat. She would get mad if I tried to help her and even when she got a mouthful of water, she waved away any help. Her independence is so unnerving that I tend to be a bit strict with her. When it’s just the two of us, it’s like fort Knox. I don’t want to be responsible for anything happening and so I am often treated to repeated eye rolling from her when I remind her that she has to hold my hand when we walk near the road. Still, she loves coming to my house. It’s filled with all kinds of cool things and she loves our dog Bodie and loves playing hide and seek in all the rooms and best of all, loves to bounce on our huge bed with all the pillows.

Often, when her mom comes to pick her up she will get angry and say, “Come back later, Mom!” She will sulk and complain about all the things we didn’t get to do. Then the negotiations take place, and usually a little bit of ice cream will do the trick.

One of her favorite things to do, aside from dressing like a princess, is to eat breakfast with me. I rarely see her in the morning, so when I do, it’s a treat. We fix all the things she likes and we sit at the kitchen table, her legs swinging wildly underneath. She eats her English muffin with peanut butter and jam and talks about all the things we are going to do when she is older.

She told me that when she is twenty, she is going to buy a house next to mine so we will be neighbors. That melts my heart and I hope that she won’t resent the fact that we will all be old when she is twenty. That’s the downside of having older parents but the upside, is more attention. It does make me feel melancholy at times though, to think that Dad might not be around when she gets married and has children of her own, but you never know.

One day while eating breakfast, she looked at me and said “We are breakfast sisters.”

I said, “That sounds like a restaurant.”

“Yeah,” she said. “We could sell breakfast stuff.”

“Like pancakes and waffles,” I said.

“Yeah, and English muffins with peanut butter and jam.”

She smiled at this thought and said, “Yes, when I grow up, we can have a restaurant called Breakfast Sisters.”

What a lovely thought. I’ll still be in my fifties then, so who knows? I laughed and said, “Breakfast Sisters, it is. We will make a fortune.”

“Yeah and everyone will want to come in there and eat breakfast with their sisters.”

“Yes, they will.” I said.

So, maybe I don’t have all the answers, I might not know the ABC’s of parenting or being the best sister, but I do know one thing. Never crush their dreams, let them think they can do anything and also, enjoy those moments while you can. They are precious, mercurial things and I am so happy that my little Sister and I can have breakfast together, and talk about restaurants, and ‘My Pretty Ponies’ and ‘Thomas the Tank Engine’ and being neighbors and all the good things in the world now, and all the good things yet to come.

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Spring in Virginia

The sun is blazing through the sky today. Spring in Virginia doesn’t creep slowly, quietly changing the landscape. It’s more of a full scale riot. The trees have suddenly transformed from that pale fresh color, like the underbelly of a frog, to a deeper green and the flowers are exploding out of the ground.

I missed a month of the spring because I was quite sick. When I started to come back to the land of the living, I noticed how bright everything was. Almost like a mirage, the hazy pollen streaked sky, the impossibly red azaleas and the birds. Several are nesting in the small piece of woods behind our townhouse and they’ve been very happy about it, singing like mad and pulling bits of moss from the side of the house. By six in the morning there is a chorus that lasts until the sun has set and the last hint of pink has faded and the bats have started to take their place, ducking and diving for insects.

I felt as if I’d come back from the dead in a way. I started to notice these little miracles around me and felt grateful that I had the opportunity to witness it all for another day.

I noticed the blue of the sky especially. Washed clean, the color of a robin’s egg, yet it hasn’t rained in days. There were no clouds and I think that if there was such a thing as a heaven, it would be that color.

Saturday the wind blew in an odd little cold front. It went from almost ninety degrees to seventy in a matter of hours. Rog was away on a hike with a friend so I decided to walk around the lake near our house. The water was choppy and brown and I saw a family of geese with little mustard colored goslings. The parents hissed at me and the babies tumbled across the lawn and slid into the water. I was wearing my explorer’s hat that I’d worn in Africa and I pulled the drawstring close to keep the wind from tearing it off my head and sending into the lake. I watched the trees sway; they cast peculiar shadows on the lawn. They made a sound like sighing and then later when the wind picked up, like roaring. It had the effect of blowing the thoughts out of my head as well which was very welcome.

I spent almost two hours studying the water, the wind and the sky, the remaining clouds scudding farther away until they were out of sight. I saw Mallard ducks preening, quacking and fussing on a little rock near the shore. As I walked around the lake I reached a wooded area that was filled with wild roses, their tangled blossoms wrapped around the base of a tree. The cloying scent filled the woods and the wind whipped the blossoms, scattering petals like rain. I was showered and walked on until the path ended.

Blizzard of 09

We have just come out of a blizzard! It started snowing on Friday and didn't let up until Saturday night. It snowed about 24 inches and we are still digging our way out of it. The snow plows finally came through late this afternoon. We had a 'Pay it Forward' moment this morning. We were shoveling the snow from our cars, trying to clear the driveway when suddenly the neighbors arrived with shovels and helped us. It was fun to get to know them and also great to have the help! Later we noticed that our other neighbor who lives across the street was trying to clear her driveway by herself so Rog went over to help and spent over an hour getting her car freed from the snow and helping create a path to the road. She gave him a bottle of wine in return so everybody wins! Cheers and Merry Christmas!

Halloween is almost here. The summer went by so fast and half the fall is gone. The leaves are beautiful right now, yellow, red and yellow. We drove up into the mountains the other day to see the leaves at their peak. It was breathtaking. It had been raining and the clouds were starting to clear. Once we reached the top of the mountain, the sun came out and a huge rainbow arched across two mountain peaks. Fall has always been my favorite time of year although I must say that this year has been a rainy one for the most part. We couldn't believe it when the sun broke through the clouds and shone on all the trees, the light bouncing off the unwordly colors.
All the kids are back in school here and the bus pulls up in front of our house every morning and the scene is reminicent of a George Romero film. The teens look like zombies, tired zombies. They walk as though they are shackled like Marley's ghost. I always chuckle at this and remember all those mornings dragging myself to school, those many years ago.
We bought a super sized bag of halloween candy from Hellmart and I've already eaten three Recee cups. I'm wondering if there will be anything left for the kids on Saturday.
My sister is dressing up as a dalmation for halloween and I am not going to be there. I wish she lived closer but at least I got to see her yesterday. We went out for pizza and ice cream. She was having some trouble with her ice cream cone and I tried to get her to eat it out of a little plastic bowl instead. The frustration was very visible on her little six year old face. I laughed and told my stepmom that sis probably wishes that I would let her eat her ice cream in peace. My sister looked up, her mouth covered in chocolate and said, "Yeah, exactly." Funniest moment of the day. Peace!

Last Swim of the Season

Lately the weather has turned cool. It’s a wonderful change from the sweltering ninety degree days that we have had all summer. Fall seems to come on suddenly here in Virginia. I was swimming at the pool one day and the next; I was dressed in blue jeans and a sweater. I had just been complaining to Rob that the pool was going to close for the season on Labor Day. I was already missing the chlorine smell, the impossibly blue pool water and the sounds of kids doing cannonballs off the diving board and their laughter. Then the next day, it was sixty degrees. I shivered at the thought of swimming in this weather but I figured that it would pass and the days would warm up again like they usually do but I think that summer may officially be over at this point.

Last night I walked around the pond near our house. As I neared the clubhouse I could hear laughter and splashing. I looked at Rob and said, “Those kids couldn't be swimming in this cold, could they?” We walked up to get a closer look and while the pool was far from full, there were a surprising amount of shivering children hugging themselves to ward off the chill only to run and leap back in again. I had to hand it to them. It’s like last call, for children. I looked at the water longingly myself but I wouldn’t think of dipping a single toe in the frigid water. I said, “We have got to go one more time, we have to.”

Rob agreed but the clock is ticking and there are only three days to do. Each chilly morning I walk around the lake, the mist rising off and burning away as the sun rises. There is a giant grey heron who sits on the edge of the dock, fishing. I approached the pool and noticed that I didn’t hear anything. I looked inside the fence and all was quiet. Kids are in school, I guess. I shivered at the thought of jumping in the cold water and turned back towards the house.

“Well, I guess we had the last swim of the year and didn’t even know it,” I said to Rob when I returned from my walk. I thought about suntan lotion and cheap novels and swimming laps and watching in wonder as Rob completes a perfect dive every time. “It’s all the years of mandatory swim lessons,” he tells me with a smile.
It’s now dusk and darkness is falling. The pool is quiet and so is the lake. I notice that the moon is almost full now and I hear the crickets droning in the background and pull my jacket tighter around me. It’s too beautiful to feel sad and I happily remember that there’s always next year.